Ytd nyt , justt fnish watchin Gokusen season two . Was a realli great japanese drama , both Gokusen andd Gokusen two . Cum to tynk of it , dis japanese drama series realli taught me alott of tings , regarding myy pastt life , currently andd mayb , myy future too .
Dere was dis part , on th second season , wen th students were gonna graduate , deir homeroom teacher said to dem . ii cant realli quote wat she had said bt ii can rafly rmbr it cos it realli sank deep into me . It goes lykk dis :
" Mayb youu hav nort done well accedemically . Bt , youu guys mustt hav learned how to protect wht's mostt impt to youu by gritting your teeth . Youu've learned nort to give upp . Youu've learned nort to run away . Believing in yourself . Believing in your friends . Always living proudly . ii wan youu to live , remembering wht youu hav learned in dese three years . Andd one more ting .. Wht lies ahead of youu , might be sad andd harsh sumtyms . Wen youu cant go thru dem alone , den rmbr , datt youu , hav friends . Andd datt youu hav me . ii will always be on your side .Hau ii wish datt ii realli hav th strength to face myy problems face to face . Hau ii wish datt ii hadnt done wht ii hav done . Hau ii wish datt ii am bold enughh to head on andd say sorrey . Hau ii wish datt ii am nort dis ego . Hauu ii realli wish datt ii hav sumone lykk Yankumi ( actress in Gokusen ) , in myy life , to give me all dose shoutings andd beatings , understanding datt ii realli nid . Hau ii wish datt ii hav sumone lykk Yankumi , to realli understand myy feelings andd whye ii choose to do some tings , even wen it tend to hurt others , or myself even .
To tynk back while ii was having myy shower earlier , it suddenly came to me datt ii was th coward one , nort her . She confronted me , asking me wht wrong she had done until ii became sooo mad at her , knowing hau short tempered ii am andd ii can be at tyms . She came forward , to face me , while ii am here , sitting infront of dis computer , feeling lonely , cos ii can nvr face dem , aftr wht ii hav written abt dem in myy blogg earlier on . She , she had th initiative to come to me , apologise infront of myy face , aftr which she wrote a long email andd sent it to me , admitting wht she had done was wrong , while im here , feeling guilty , nort knowing hau ii shuld apologise to dem . She cried , infront of dem , nort caring abt wht dey might tynk of her , while im here , stopping myy tears frm falling , bt in th end , im feeling realli stupid andd hurt , up til nau .
Hau more stupid cann ii get ? ii dun even hav th courage to upp right to deir faces , to tell dem datt im sorrey . ii dun even hav th guts to cry infront of dem , tynking datt its realli shameful . ii dun even hav th consience to admit datt ii was wrong . All ii dare to do nau is hide frm dem . Run away . Avoid dem . Bt until wen cann ii afford to run away frm dem ? Im starting to miss myy family alott . ii thot datt doing dis , was easy enough . ii justt hav to run away , wenever it comes to dem , knowing datt im nort th only human whum hav done datt to deir families . Bt again , ii feel realli stupid . Sooo coward . Atleast she hav th courage to face us wen she did smth realli dumb andd stupid . Me ? Im just brave enough to talk behind dem andd sucha a dumb coward wen it comes to facing dem .
ii thought datt ii wuld go on w life justt fine w/o dem , knowing datt ii moved on justt fine w/o dose peop lykk myy pastt friends andd exys . Bt ii guess ii was wrong . Dis is myy family im talking about , ii didnt tynk about datt den . ii was sooo stupid , thinking datt ii culd live w/o dem wen all dese while , ii realise , dey are th close ones to me .
Its true wht peop say , we tend to appreciate tings only wen its gone . Im realli glad datt ii realise dis earlier . Realli glad .
